Resilience 101
I spent the better part of my young working life as a professional dancer. Due to talent, hard work and commitment I was lucky to work with some amazing artists but the world of auditioning in Los Angeles was as toxic and cut-throat as you can imagine. Picture 100 of the most gorgeous women wearing minimal clothing, a full face of makeup, dancing for their lives in a sweaty mirrored room while the choreographer looks on with an unimpressed face behind dark sunglasses. I didn’t realize it at the time but one of the biggest life skills that I learned during this season was resilience.
“Resilience” refers to both the process and the outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences.
Without knowing it I became an expert problem solver as I didn’t have the time (or sometimes money) to bask in feeling sorry for myself, instead focusing on what I did have the power to do. I found practices like yoga, mindfulness and breathwork that provided alternative ways of coping outside of booze and food. I also took each challenge, rejection or “failure” as an opportunity to learn more about myself and what I might need to do the next time.
So while we may not have the power to shift the entire culture of the company we work for overnight or do anything about instability in world governments or the economy, there are a few tools that we can add to our toolkit so we feel better equipped to deal with life’s inevitable stressors.
Develop self-awareness: First understand how you deal with stress. Understand your strengths and weaknesses.
Build self-regulation & coping strategies: Know what positive habits and behaviors make you feel good. Exercising, spending time outside, acts of kindness, journaling, getting enough sleep and whole foods, and tapping into creative outlets can bolster us even on bad days.
Turn the obstacle upside down: Take your challenges and shift them into learning opportunities. If you are dealing with a difficult person, rather than focusing on how frustrated they make you feel, reframe it as an opportunity to learn patience, compassion and understanding.
Shift your mindset: Instead of looking for all of the ways you or a situation is doomed to fail, look for positive, problem-solving actions you can take. Once you’ve identified your strengths, you can lean into them.
Sometimes it is easy to feel powerless in the face of things we can’t control. But we have it in our power to use our anxieties and heartaches as motivation to thrive regardless of our circumstances.